I have begun crushing on notable women for money

When Townsquare Media asked if I would write about the beauty of each female they could summon from their list of crushes, I said sure. I was going to wax rhapsodic on that topic just walking down the street, so I might as well do it for the internet. So with that, here’s the original text from my first Crush of the Day article: Ashlee Adams, an Aussie, meaning there’s no hope or help for me but to put on my Tex Avery wolf ears.

Ashlee Adams rocks glasses like a good girl should

You probably noticed Ashlee Adams is a tattooed sexbomb crafty enough to break our hearts with a pair of librarian glasses. What you might not know is this two-time Penthouse pet is an avid gamer, and if there’s anything sexier than a girl that will shoot you in the face it’s one who taunts you afterword in an Australian accent.

When not kicking your ass in the latest shooter, Ms. Adams feeds Tumblr a parade of sexy shots. Keep your eyes open for fanboy bait, and you may see her in what may charitably be called half of a Hogwarts uniform. It’s even hotter Potter than Snape’s photospread in Maxim, and we’re just glad this saucy Aussie didn’t opt for the cloak of invisibility.

She’s currently running an aggressive bid for Penthouse Pet of the Year, and needs your vote, so take a moment to punch your ballot with her name. It will be giving something back to someone who has given us so much, and we’d get more shiny shots of both her outback and her down under. Vote now or we’ll make even worse Australia puns. You really don’t want to hear the one about kookaburras.

While you’re doing that it may interest you to learn that this self-confessed high school nerd also made a documentary about the life of a Penthouse Pet. So you get all of the sexy stripper video in a presentable sociological package. Neat!