Oh no, the Halloween party starts in 20 minutes and you have no costume! Lucky for you, you need look no further than a one-size-stretches-to-fit-all morphsuit. With no accessories you can be one of America’s favorite gimps, as detailed in my latest Maxim article.
I’m not gonna lie, though, the Greendale Human Being takes a little prep. I tried to be one when the idea came to me late Saturday evening. Next year, McGinley. Next year.
Till then…I’m the wingtipped Green Lantern, because even superheroes add a touch of class when they party. Total costume cost: $2 facepaint and one borrowed pair of legwarmers.