After the last couple of heavy, verbose satirical bits, I thought it would be fun to just chew on something we can all agree on: people will break your heart.
Kidding! Batman always wins. That's a given. But if you want to know the string theory underlying the particles of victory that make Batman the Harlem Globetrotters of superheroes, I've broken it down for you on Cracked.
I bet Batman dies in a really disappointing fashion, like getting stabbed by Sting Ray while hunting Killer Croc