The 12 Most Amazing (and Useless) Wikipedia Entries

Someone in England wrote this article, and then I Americanized it, turning every wry witticism into toilet humor. I also swapped out odd-toed ungulates for Alpha Flight, because they’re terrible, whereas ungulates are an all right order of mammals in my book. Wikipedia page: Donaudampf schiffahrtselektrizitatenhaupt betriebswerkbauunterbeamtengesellschaft (all one word) Which is what? An incredibly … Read more

Hannibal’s view

Here’s my very first Asylum article, followed by some bonus material. Happy birthday, President Washington! What made Ol’ Wooden Chompers the Father of Our Country (besides spending all of mom’s money on drink), was his sheer will to make the army function. When the Pennsylvania Line mutinied, Washington did the unexpected: He took their grievances … Read more

Love Almanac

New Asylum article went up today! The Love Almanac. It’s got a real purty infographic made specially for you. Every year, February builds up to that one holiday that means so much to so many: Presidents Day. What most people don’t realize is that another day, hidden in the mix, promises love and joy to … Read more