Seven ’80s Cartoons Better Than the Ones You Watched

Bravestarr and 30-30 are bros for life

Kids who grew up in the 1980s were blessed. While adults from that time only remember authoritarian anti-Communist jingo vs. authoritarian actual Communist nuclear terror, all stewing in an invisible health crisis, we were blissfully consuming sugary cereals and some of the finest animation options to ever grace a screen. Sure, the scripts were all ludicrous and hinged on logic that would blast even a child’s understanding of storytelling, but it’s all better than the weird videos on YouTube written for and by AI programs.

And yet, do not say that just because we had Transformers and G.I. Joe, we were rich. The really great cartoons lurked below the cultural landscape, toiling in the nostalgia mines. Their work made them strong, and they hold up in a way the frail former Masters of the Universe do not today. Here’s how you should have spent your youth:

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Why I Hate the Autobots

The Autobots are jerks in Michael Bay's 2007 Transformers

Payoff is everything. It’s been a couple of years since I went to see Transformers for a friend’s birthday and walked out of the theater angry. Angry at the flick, and for awhile, angry at myself for caring. After all, I have no great nostalgia for the original ’80s franchise (I save my reminiscence for … Read more